History Repeats
by Trishata96
Summary: As Arty boards the Normandy on Virmire, she thinks about the friend she is leaving behind and how she has abandoned a loved one again. Then Artemis makes a decision that threatens her life and the mission. Author Note: Not sure whether to have this as canon or scrap it.
1. History Repeats

**History Repeats**

Artemis' heart was pounding, her body screaming for reprieve as her feet slammed on the metal grating. The gunfire was closer now. She could feel the use of biotics. The gentle hum that always soothed her, that belonged to Kaidan. But there was no familiar bursts of rifle fire. Ashley's timed, precision squeezes of the trigger.

_Because she's at the bomb site. Where __**you**__ abandoned her. __**You **__abandoned __**your **__best friend. __**Again. **__And Why? For a man you have a __**childish**__ crush on._

Artemis shook the voice from her head, trying to ignore I, no matter how much it was right. Ash knew the risks, Alenko was higher ranking, more important, more experienced. Ashley knew that, that's why she'd told Artemis to get Kaidan. "I don't regret anything." Ash's words echoing back to her.

Artemis burst though the door, shotgun already in action, Geth falling as the rounds burst though their chests. She took cover next to her lieutenant. Kaidan didn't say anything, he could sense the tears forming at the corner of her eyes and his own. Soon the roar of Normandy's engine broke though. There was a thud as the cargo door was lowered then the yells of her team mates as they covered their retreat onto the Normandy. The cargo door began to close and the engines began to warm up. She leaned against some crates, choking back sobs.

Why? Why did she have to chose? Why did she have to sacrifice her **best friend**?

Artemis looked to Ashley's bench. Memories flashing before her eyes. Ash's skilled hands skimming over weapons as she cleaned them, installed mods. The times when she and Arty would have competitions, Ash always winning. The pranks they played on Kaidan and Joker. The girl talk, the nudges and head jerks at a certain lieutenant to make her blush. The promise of having a girl's night out at flux. A promise that would never be kept. Just like the promise of a safe home and family from thirteen years ago. The promise of never letting anything happen to her…

Smoke wafted up her nose bringing back the painful memories. Ashes, burning bodies, burning eezo. It was happening again and there was nothing she could do about it…

NO. There was something. She could try to stop this. She **would **try.

Pushing herself away from the crates, she bolted towards the rapidly closing cargo bay days. She ran up the steeping incline, oblivious to her name being screamed. Barely fitting though the gap, she leapt, flying though the air. The edge of the tower racing to greet her. So close, yet so far. Her fingers barely caught the ledge and the landing knocked the breath out of her lungs. Using new found strength she hauled herself up and sprinted to the lift, fist slamming the down button. Noise was in her ear, voices arguing, panicked. Finally the lift opened and she pelted across the walkways, grabbing a pile of cable and tying it around her waist and a nearby pillar. Leaping over the guard rail she abseiled into the trenches.

Now she could hear gunfire, Ashley's calm bursts now panicked. Cutting herself loose, Arty took cover, pistol aimed at nearby Geth. Artemis barely heard Ashley's shocked exclamations. At first she thought it her presence. But No. It was Saren. The Turian bastard had dropped in behind her and had not noticed Shepard. Saren advanced on Ashley, the blue cybernetic eyes blazing with fury. Every sound became vivid. Every gunshot slamming against Saren's shields. The crunch of the gravel underneath Saren's feet. The overheating warning on Ashley's rifle. She threw it away and drew her pistol, only for it to be kicked away by the rogue spectre. The strangled scream as Ash was hoisted into the air by the throat. Saren's mouth moved, forming poisonous words.

"Your pretty sacrifice won't help Shepard. You will die for nothing human." His grip tightened, slowly choking her friend… no, her sister to death. Angry burst though every fibre of her being. Nobody threatened her family. NOBODY.

The Turian gave a startled cry as he was tackled to the ground. They rolled in the gravel. Artemis scoring a hit by bringing her knee up sharply to what she guessed was Saren's crotch, swiftly followed by a punch to the face. The punch knocked Saren off her and she scrambled to her feet. Her entire body was cloaked in a blue crackling field. With a mere flick of her hand, Saren was slammed into the wall. She needed to protect her family. She was not going to leave her little sister behind.

The Normandy came into her eyesight, coming in to land, cargo bay door already open. Hauling Ashley to her feet, they began to run for the Normandy. The bomb's timer appearing at the top of their HUDs. One minute and 30 seconds. Their boots thudded onto the ramp, arms outstretched to take Ashley to safety. Then Tali's startled voice yelled over the radio.

"Rocket Geth!" The rocket hit the floor right next to Artemis sending her flying and embedding shrapnel into her. Everything was now distorted. Vaguely she heard voices and words. ' Joker… Hell…. Here… Chakwas… medbay…'

Kaidan. That was his voice. His face came into view, dirt covering his face where the helm offered no protection. He was yelling her name, telling… no, ordering her to focus on his voice, on him. Darkness was now clawing at her vision, as Kaidan scooped her up and hurried her to the med bay. On instinct, she raised a hand to his cheek and stammered out one word: "Sorry."

**Based on cut dialogue from the Virmire mission in Mass Effect. Apparently you could originally save both Ashley and Kaidan, though it was never said how. Just check this you tube vid, not sure if it's genuine but... well wishful thinking.  
**

**/watch?v=zMSJDxM8YT4&playnext=1&list=PLE80C6E29B5FF107B&feature=results_video**

**I'm not 100% sure whether I should have this as canon for Artemis' storyline and hence continue this. Reviews are welcome.**


	2. Waiting

**Waiting**

The mess hall as deathly silent, along with the rest of the ship, all but for the sound of repair work, Ashley's whispered prayers and Kaidan's pacing. The Normandy had received substantial damage from being so close to the initial explosion. But even Joker was not concerned about his baby. They were all worried about Artemis. The shrapnel from the rocket had punched though her shields and armour, embedding deep near her spinal cord. Dr. Chakwas was now currently removing the metal and had been doing so for the last hour. Wrex was leaning against the wall near Kaidan's workplace, silently brooding. Tali was curled up next to Liara for comfort while Garrus' mandibles were still. Jules, the requisitions officer, had come up from the cargo bay and had an arm around Ashley, trying to comfort her.

The silence was cut by the deafening hiss of a door opening. Dr Chakwas stepped out, the last hour's stress evident on her face. The lines of age becoming more enhanced. Every pair of eyes focused on her , pleading, begging for good news.

"She's going to make it." An audible sigh rippled throughout the entire ship. "Though the shrapnel caused some very major damage. There is some shrapnel in her spinal cord that I can not remove without causing paralysis. She'll have to take it easy and if she puts too much stress on her body, Artemis may end up paralyzing herself." Kaidan lowered his head in sorrow.

"Doc. Will she be able to keep in active duty?" Asked Ashley, choking back a few sobs.

"For now yes. But I recommend that as soon as we get back to the citadel, she goes Huetra memorial hospital to get the shrapnel removed, ASAP." Everyone nodded solemnly, Joker had already set them on a course for the citadel. They had the co-ordinates to the Mu relay, the cipher and hopefully Artemis had the location of Illos in her mind

"Can she have visitors?" Asked Tali.

"Yes. In fact you can all take shifts keeping an eye on her. She'll need a friendly face when she wakes up." Chakwas then headed off for some much needed rest. Ashley immediately insisted on taking first watch and nobody stopped her. She sat beside Arty's bedside, hesitantly she held her hand and began to speak while watching the peaceful look on her commander's face.

"Hey skipper. I… I don't know if you can hear me but… ah screw it, I'm just gonna talk anyway. Thank you. Thank you for coming back for me, even though I told you **not** to. You had everyone worried back there and you've still got us worried. The council is sure to chew you out for this along with Udina, but if I ever had any doubts about you Artemis. You just introduced them to a Cain. Hell, you're like a big sister I never had. Just don't ever do that again. You had LT in tears. So don't be surprised if he crushes your ribs with a bear hug when you wake up." Ash wiped away the tears streaking down her cheeks, trying to compose herself. Then she began to read out aloud from the book Arty had gotten her for Christmas.

_The Winds as at their hour of birth  
Leaning upon the ridged sea  
Breathed low around the rolling earth  
With mellow preludes, 'we are free'_

_The Streams through many a lilied row  
Down-carolling to the crisped sea  
Low-tinked with a bell-like flow  
Atween the blossoms, 'we are free'_

Later, when Ashley had reached the middle of the book when Tali came in for her shift. No words were exchanged, Ashley merely finished the poem she was on then left. Tali sighed and sat down, nervously rubbing her six fingers together.

"Shepard… I cannot say how much you mean to everyone on the ship. You've given my people hope with the Geth data. You've given us a chance of getting our home world back. All by risking yourself, the Alliance wouldn't have allowed you to give it freely to me… Thank you and please… wake up because at this rate Kaidan is going to wear a hole in the floor and **I am not** fixing that." Soon Garrus took over. The Turian's mandibles twitching nervously as he sat down. Respectfully, he nodded the way he would when Shepard did her after mission rounds.

"Commander. You definitely had us worried there but I knew… I knew you'd make it. Until Saren's dead along with the reapers and… well if you did die on a mission, I could imagine you kicking the… damn what is it again… grem reaper? Anyway, kicking the Grem reaper in the crotch and telling him to get lost." Garrus paused to chuckle at the image in his mind. "Shepard, you know when I said that my father wouldn't liked you. Well I think he actually would have loved you. You're a spectre yet you abide by your own set of rules, your morals. You make sure the mission doesn't always come first, that you don't misuse your power. He may still have trouble with some of your methods but… he'd respect you." The door hissed open and Liara shuffled in. Garrus gave her a curt nod and went back to fixing the Mako. For the first ten minutes, Liara sat in silence, quietly sniffing. Finally, she found the courage to speak.

"Commander, I know you blame yourself for my mother's death. For destroying the only family I knew of. Please don't, as I told you I will remember my mother for who she was, not her deeds and I have found a new family on board the Normandy. Ashley, Wrex, Garrus, Tali, Joker, they are like my brothers and sisters, while you are the mother trying to keep us all in check. Lieutenant Alenko… well I suppose he would be the father, your bond mate… I'd suspected before and ,well today's events have definitely confirmed it, for myself, yourselves… and the rest of the crew. Don't worry Ashley has already talked to the crew about any impressions they have… while she was cleaning her rifle and Wrex was cleaning his shotgun. I believe they got the message." Liara stopped when there was a soft, polite knocking out the med bay door. Calling out to the person to come in, Liara was surprised when Wrex entered though the door, somewhat struggling to get though. When the Asari had left Wrex stared long and hard at Shepard.

"Shepard… And this is where you say Wrex… Come on… Shepard." The Krogan nudged her and sighed. "Right if you can hear me, anything I say, I refuse to repeat and I will deny saying it. Understood." Wrex paused waiting as if he was imagining what Shepard's response would be. " Right. Shepard. You were right. I shouldn't have given up on the Krogans so soon. As long as we are alive, we have a chance. Krogan are meant to fight and I am going to fight, to unite the Krogan people. Soon as I have seen Saren's dead body, I going back to clan Urdnot and the first daughter I have is getting named Shepard. And No! I am not going soft."

All too soon it was Kaidan's shift. The biotic had buried himself in work, building a wall to isolate himself from the memory of Shepard's breath fading fast as he carried her. Her eyes closing.. Without even thinking of the rules he picked up her hand and held it close to his stubbled cheek.

"Shepard… Commander…" Was there any point of hiding it anymore? Everyone on the ship knew now, hell even a blind and deaf Salarian could have seen that due to his panicked state when Shepard had jumped off the Normandy. " Arty. You had me w-worried there, please don't ever do that to me again." He stroked her cheek, his thumb trailing over her dark velvet skin. A single tear falling onto the bed sheets. "Please wake up Arty. For me.. Please wake up as there's something I need to tell you. You may already know what I'll say and that I'm most probably committing career suicide but I don't give a damn about for now. Artemis, I-I Love you. You-you make me feel human." Finally the dam he'd built crumbled, Kaidan buried his head into the bed and unashamedly let the tears flow.

**The poem is Song (Hour Of Birth) by Tennyson. The kicking the Grim reaper in the crotch is a reference to Red Dwarf. Reviews are still welcome.  
Trishata96**


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